Week 38, Day 2

So sex makes the baby some faster, eh? I am going to put it to the test. I told my co-worker I think that is just something they say to make us have sex with our partners. But we shall see.

I was having stronger and longer Braxton Hicks a few days ago with some shooting around my back. Nothing that doubled me over, but I felt it. I told my sister about this and she said ‘um hmmm, it was 3 or 4 days for me before the baby came when that started happening’. We are having lots of movement too. My little girl is just out of room and that’s all to it. Between the movement and contractions, I can tell the end is near, how near? I am not sure. I reported everything to my doctor who told me to tell the contractions to behave until next week when we have our planned c/s. He said if I have more than 4 contractions an hour that last longer than 1 minute to come in. I say, if my water breaks I will go on in.

I am bloated and my nose is constantly peeling. I mean my nose is so flaky its not funny. The more I grease it up the more it flakes. Alas, I give in. I have braided my hair and plan to do a manicure, pedicure and eyebrow arch on Friday (if I last). That way I’ll look decent at the hospital. As it stands, I just want to be able to sleep on my back atleast, the stomach will come after I heal. I want my arm to stop going numb and my feet and fingers to stop swelling. I can’t even wear my wedding rings. But its all part of the game plan and victory will be mine in the end!

We got the travel system Monday. Oh its so cute. I also got the bassinet off craigslist and washed every part of it. I am going to assemble it tonight and my husband is going to set up the main level of the house for me when I get home. I am so excited and anxious! I am one day closer to holding my Lil’ Butterbean. Pregnancy has been a wonderful journey and I can’t wait to share our birth story.

Week 37, Day 3

14 more days until I hold my Lil’ Butterbean. At least that is the plan. For some reason I do not believe Lil’ Butterbean is going to stick to the plan, but it’s all up to God to decide. I’ve had a few people tell me that they think the last week in July will be the time. I agree as I have always thought my baby would be born at 38 weeks. Now I long for the desire to go into labor naturally even if it results in c/s. What I mean is, I want Lil’ Butterbean to choose her own due date, to feel some contractions and then do the c/s. I am opting for that next pregnancy since I did not do it this time. But like I said I think Lil’ Butterbean will make her debut and I will get to experience all of that and be happy to get a c/s as opposed to pushing her out.

Sunday, we went on the hospital tour and that was informative and fun. It just helps reinforce things for Mr. Butterbean Sr. and get him mentally prepped. He is so anxious to meet our little girl and it’s quite precious to me. She is sooooooo active and he has seen and felt her movements lately. He told me that it seems like she wants to come out. I told him I think so. One night he said I grunted in my sleep all night and he was afraid to sleep for something happening. I told him it’s just his little one up and doing some aggressive movement, movement that I am sure will pop the bag and send me into labor. But we will see. I just brace myself for what may happen at any moment.

In the meantime, I am tired because I am not getting the sleep they suggest. How can I when the baby is so active at sleep time and I can barely get comfortable? On top of that the feet and hands are slightly swollen and my face and nose have just taken a turn for the worse (LOL!!). I feel bloated, my breasts are changing more than ever now and when I wake in the morning my eyes are red and puffy. It ain’t pretty, but that is what’s up. Soon I will be beaming and glowing again, when I see this little girl and hold her close. I can’t wait!

Almost 9 months

I am ready today. I have been going back and forth regarding delivery, not quite ready and a little anxious, wanting the baby all to myself, loving our time together…but today, I feel ready. I think it has more to do with my physical than my mental. My body is ready for this to end it seems. I have the puffiness in my face and feet, inability to get enough sleep and need to do some real body detoxing. I remember one of my co-workers saying ‘I am so over the whole pregnancy thing’ when she was at the end. I don’t feel like that, just feel like my body is saying ‘I can’t take much more’. Not to mention one of my co-workers wives just delivered a 9lb 1oz baby boy and another just went on maternity leave with hopes the baby will come soon.

My sleep is off now. This is the time they say get as much rest as you can, but my 9 hours are just not enough anymore. I need 12. This weekend I slept in both days and found myself waking up after 12 hours, so I know that is what I need. Last night I was down at 9:15 but I certainly did not get 9 hours of sleep. I was up a bit waiting on Lil’ butterbean to settle down, then up a few times for potty breaks, tossing from side to side unable to get comfortable, hot, cold, thirsty and just waiting on those annoying birds to start their daggone chirping outside my window (turns out they did not start until around 6:30am as opposed to 4:30am). How am I supposed to get sleep like this? By the time the baby comes I’ll be doubly exhausted.

On another note, I did some good work in the nursery. I hung the curtains and the wall art, I febreezed the gilder and ottoman, I washed her clothes to take to the hospital. Today I’ll finish washing a few other things and pack her bag. I am going home at lunchtime today to do some more work, like sort the recycle, because Mr. Butterbean Sr. refuses to accept recycling is not just a good thing, it’s the law in our area. As I was folding Lil’ Butterbean’s clothes I marveled at the tiny little newborn pants, then thought wonder if they will be high waters on those long grasshopper legs the doctors say she has. LOL!!! Its okay, she’ll get one good wear out of them atleast. Tonight I’ll get the little socks I purchased at the Mom’s swap meet and wash those, along with a couple receiving blankets and stuff.

Get this, one of my neighbors heard me talking about breast feeding and gave me a medela pump! I was so pleased, she said she was going to give it to goodwill and I encouraged her to put it on Craigslist or Ebay, but she said she does not have the patience for that. So she gave it to me along with 2 receiving blankets and a little seat (the name escapes me now). I thought it was such a generous gift. So that’s one other thing I don’t have to worry about purchasing. YIPPEE!!!

So tomorrow is our next appointment and I am taking questions from my birthing plan in to go over. After today I go every week, but the doctor’s told me I do not have to do the internal exams since I am having a c/s. Well that’s a plus, my doctor has some pretty big hands. Ouch!

What's New at 34 Weeks?

What’s new at 34 weeks – my teeth hurt. I woke up the other morning to aching teeth. I read that this is part of the body getting lax and ready to give birth. My clumsiness and forgetfulness are in high gear. My hair, which normally grows fast anyway, seems to be sprouting like a chia pet. My feet are slightly swollen, my abdomen is tight when I get up from sitting and my Braxton Hicks are really more noticeable.

All this preparation...and I gotta have a c-section.

Week 34, Day 1

Another great check-up for Lil’ Butterbean. Her heartbeat was very strong again yesterday and she is still head down. Of course, she keeps me going with lots of activity, but I love that too. We have 5 more weeks to go and I am anxious but slightly dreading the end of our journey together. I know I must sound selfish but I have bonded so much with her and I don’t want anyone else entering our union. LOL!!! I know, I know it will be even better when she is born and Mr. Butterbean Sr. has to be a part of all this too, but still…

No one could have ever told me how much I would enjoy pregnancy. I don’t know if it is because I struggled to conceive and fought and prayed for this baby that I am enjoying it so much or that I really can’t believe it is happening. I mean, I always knew it would happen but I am still in awe. Yesterday I passed by the mirror in the bathroom and I actually stopped to do a double take. I just stared at myself in the mirror, marveling over my pregnant belly, how my nose has spread (and I hope it stops) and I look like one of those pregnant women I’ve seen who are ready to pop, the ones who would cause my eyes to fill with tears and my heart to ache as I longed for a baby in my womb. I just smiled and praised God for this miracle. When I feel my baby move inside of me, I am in awe, unbelieving that some women receive this gift so easily and could care less about it or that they are not exceedingly happy that God has answered. Everyday with my baby is a miracle to me. It is a reason to get up out of bed and go forward with my day, a reason to rejoice and be glad. I am so very glad!

So, as I count down these final 5 weeks I have mixed emotions. I know I’ll be back telling you guys how sleepy I am or how I cannot imagine life without my little one and how seeing her face brings me such joy, but for now I am equally happy to have her tucked safely inside of me, with me every moment. It truly brings tears of joy to my eyes. I will never cease to praise God for answering our prayers. It was not as if I was so deserving, but he saw fit to answer and all I can do is be thankful.

Week 33, Day 1

The date has been set for our c-section. It will be August 5, 2009 at 9:30am. I will be 39 weeks and 1 day. I wanted to schedule as closely as I could to week 40. It is sort of neat to be able to put a date and time to it. Original due date is August 11 and Mr. Butterbean Sr. selected the 5th since I was born on the 5th. I was thinking along the same lines as well.

Since my last post, we attended a c-section birth class to help prepare us for what is to come. It was informative and Mr. Butterbean Sr. really got a lot of it. I can’t ask for much more. After we finished the class we viewed a live c-section birth video online. Another eye opener for Mr. Butterbean Sr. He called me at work several times through the video to say ‘this is serious’ or ‘this is deep’ or ‘Oh Lord’. Poor guy LOL!!! I told him I had seen a myomectomy video and so I sort of knew what to expect only thing is a baby comes out at the end instead of a big fibroid. Well when I sat down to watch it I was alarmed at the how huge the ladies uterus was. Good grief it was big, but what can one expect. The uterus is a friggin’ amazing muscle. It is normally the size of a fist and can stretch to the size of a watermelon. That is some powerful stuff! The video did help me and I think we will do fine, now that I know Mr. Butterbean Sr. has watched it and understands what is going to be happening. He said, all I know is to stay on the other side of the curtain and not look over there. LOL!!! He will be there to hold my hand and help me through this, so I am opting not to get a doula. Plus they only allow one person back so…

I am also writing up my birth plan. I gotta make sure I have stuff in writing so the doctor’s know what I expect. I don’t have time to leave it up to them to decide for me. For example, they say they strap your arms down during surgery. I say heck no! Who wants to be strapped down like Frankenstein? Not me. So I am requesting my arms be free. They say it is to prevent you from grabbing into the surgical area when you feel the pressure and tugging with them getting the baby out. I say ‘bullshyt, I’ve never noticed a laboring woman with her arms tied down’. But at any rate, we’ll see.

I am currently researching staples versus stitches or glue to close my incision and leaning heavily towards staples. It was a big surprise for me as well, but after my myomectomy scar healed so hideously, I think stapling will be a better option to reduce bumpiness and keloids. When they cut this ugly mess off I want it to heal more smoothly.

On a final note, I got to see my baby in action for the last time on u/s. They did some measuring to find she is about 4lbs 4oz, head down and ready to go. She has her mommie’s chubby cheeks and her daddy’s long legs (just as I predicted). I can’t wait to meet this little girl and am completely in love all over again.

Week 30, Day 1

My final consult is complete. Mr. Butterbean Sr. and I went to have a consultation with a well respected and experienced doctor named Dr. Jean Tchabo. He specializes in VBAC births and so I wanted to meet with him and to make my final decision on VBAAM. He looked at the operative report and the x-rays of my HSG to see the shape of my uterus. He then recommended that we go ahead and do a c-section. He said of course vaginal birth can be tried, but it is not wise. He told me to not feel as if I had failed and to go ahead and do this and preserve my uterus. He said that if my uterus was to rupture at the incision, then the baby would come popping out of the top and the placenta would be deprived. He then said that he thinks it is a miracle that they removed such a large fibroid from my fundus and were able to stitch me up while keeping my tubes open. He mentioned that if my uterus ruptured I would probably not be able to have more children. He asked how many we wanted and I said 3-4 and he said it is possible, he has done up to 7 c-sections on one woman so it is possible. Mr. Butterbean Sr. asked about healing time, which the doctor said 9 months to heal and then try again. I was pleased with that tidbit.

Then Mr. Butterbean Sr. asked his favorite question, which is how tall will the baby be since he is well over 6 feet and I am barely over 5. The doctor said the baby will be a big baby and he thinks she’ll be 8 lbs because he can tell I am running out of space and will begin to grow out instead of up. He said I am probably having difficulty breathing at times, lots of indigestion and unable to eat a lot. He was dead on in what he was saying because often I have to stand up or stretch to give Lil’ Butterbean the room she needs. Sometimes I think she is busting out. So he recommended I eat 8 small meals a day and was very happy with the 10 pound weight gain. Now I was thinking Lil’ Butterbean would top out at 6lbs at the most, so a number like 8lbs has me floored. I guess we will see.

He made me feel so relaxed and at ease. And answered all of Mr. Butterbean Sr.’s questions at length. Now I see why he came so highly recommended by midwives. We were both happy with our visit when we left and will move ahead with scheduling the c-section at 39 weeks.

As of now, I am still feeling a lot of action from Lil’ Butterbean. I truly do not have a lot of appetite, but have been trekking along eating my small snacks every 2 hours and enjoying my time in the nursery (still not complete). I also am finalizing my gift registries in preparation for a couple of baby showers. That should be fun.

To God be the glory for all he has done, is doing and will do.